Yey!!! It’s your birthday again in just a few weeks or months. And you’re finally turning the big 40. You can’t wait for life to finally unravel because everyone who’s gone ahead of you promised that life begins at 40. Where you’re expecting to be happier, wealthier, at peace, and more in tune with yourself. But, the reality is that 40 is also the dreaded beginning of a midlife crisis.
Because of this, you’re no longer feeling as enthusiastic about your birthday this year. But, worry not, because, we are here to help you understand and cope with the challenges ahead of you.
In today’s video, we’ll be navigating through a wholesome list of ways you can cope with a midlife crisis.
Normalize it
Yes, I said normalize midlife crisis. Today a lot of scrutiny and stereotypes have been imposed on people in their midlife crisis. No wonder many people are trying a bit too hard to fit into their former age groups. Maybe by dressing inappropriately in jeans way tighter than their agemates would prefer or even cruising around town trying to impress young ladies. Allow yourself the chance to understand this world-spread phenomenon. Embrace it wholesomely because you won’t be the only one to go through it. Everyone at one point will be at this stage regardless of gender or financial status. At the very least, that thought should console you.
Embrace your creative side
In the moment of trying to find yourself in the midst of a midlife crisis, the best solution is to tap into your creative side. And yes! We all have a creative side, and if you think you don’t it’s because many of you are too busy or of the mindset that you aren’t talented enough. What many successful stories fail to highlight is that we can only succeed at something we enjoy doing. Once you are content with your talent or job, you’ll be able to work at your optimum level, and here’s why. One, you are comfortable handling the task, and two it’s something you like doing. To test the theory, try figuring out something you are good at and try consistently doing it for a month. What’s the outcome? Embracing your creativity will help heal the wounds faster. Go big with anything you set your mind to, do it. Be it surfing, writing, painting, or even if you want to be the next Rihanna, it’s up to you.
Wait it out
The number one thing you’ll battle with as you go through a midlife crisis is doubt. You’ll doubt whether you’re truly satisfied with your job, where you live, the friends you’ve made, and even your spouse. Some days you’ll wake up willing and ready to jump ship at the slightest inconvenience. But before you go and hand in your resignation letter, take a deep breath and chill. Think about what you gave up to get to where you are right now. Is all that hard work worth losing just because you aren’t feeling up to it on that day? A midlife crisis is characterized by a dip in happy hormones. That leaves you feeling very anxious and uncertain about every decision in your life. This is just one of those episodes which I can promise you will pass. Be patient with yourself and remember how you felt about the decisions you made in your 20’s. They’ll remind you that you were very conscious about making them, so you shouldn’t doubt yourself now.
Take time to realize when you’re having an ‘episode’. Then slowly talk yourself out of being irrational.
Do not presume
When it comes to your health care, don’t try to be smart about it. For example, by going to google trying to self-diagnose. No matter what flavors you’ve heard going around, not every cough is absolutely lung cancer. You might be having an allergic reaction or a cold. Furthermore, the more years you sit in there, the weaker your immune system gets without good upkeep. You must go for a jog or do some cardio or another form of exercise you may do to keep in good shape. You’ll probably be getting your very first set of reading glasses soon because your eyes don’t work as well as they used to before. Except that most of your body parts will wear out. Because the truth is, they’ve served their purpose well for many decades now. Additionally, don’t ignore any serious symptoms. Make an appointment as soon as you catch something that isn’t going away on its own. It might probably be nothing, but it’s always a good idea to check it out.
Avoid alcohol and other drugs
Someone once said to me we use our weekends so haphazardly. Because most of us drink to celebrate something great happening in our lives. At the same time, we drink to drown our pain because something happened in our lives. And when nothing happens, we drink so that we could cause something to happen. Alcohol is the last solution you should turn to when going through a hard time in your life. Most times it’s only going to make things worse than they already are. Because if you think going to the bar to have a couple of drinks to cool off because the argument you had today with your better half was bad. Imagine coming back home drunk with lipstick on your shirt. Since the ladies you were hanging out with didn’t know boundaries. This could easily lead to a separation or divorce, especially when you become too accustomed to spending your time at those hangouts. The best thing you can do for yourself is to always have a sober mind. It will help you see the other person’s views. And sooner than you know it, you’ll be able to come to an am I able solution.
Speak to someone
Trust me, nothing good ever came out of bottling up your feelings. Especially in these trying times, you’ll need the support of family and friends to get you through it. That’s why I encourage you to take a look into your intimate circle and find people you can talk to. Those who’ll listen without judgment, and when needed they’ll give you the awakening you need. This person will be the light at the end of the tunnel when everything else seems dark.
If you don’t have any friends or family that you can trust, there’s no shame in going to a therapist or counsellor. They will help guide your feelings and perceptions, which will ensure that you refocus your life as needed. Find a good therapist who’ll listen and also ensure that you feel comfortable with them.
One important thing you shouldn’t do is to book an appointment with a therapist to diagnose you. You’ll end up worse than you came in when you risk doing this. Instead, find someone who will help you navigate everything. Also, they’ll help you identify which signs are midlife crisis traits and which aren’t. They’ll build you up to be independent while also leaving the door open whenever you backslide.
Mindful meditation
Just like a Jedi, we all need meditation. It’s not only important for the mentally unstable, but a very crucial tool for our physical and mental health. You don’t have to hymn in one particular position for hours on end like the monks in the movies. All you have to do is stay aware of your thoughts, and be able to reflect on your actions and weigh your reactions. It’s a perfect remedy to finding balance within oneself. The fun part is that whether you do it for a minute or an hour, the outcome is the same as long as you get your mind into that deep meditative state. How else would you manage a midlife crisis if you don’t start with your mental health? Try it today and tell us if it didn’t work wonders for you.
Make some life changes
Once you desire growth, change becomes inevitable, and you’ll have to do anything to get your business done. Just like when a painter is crafting his masterpiece, he’s flexible to adjustment. Similarly, if you can picture your life as a masterpiece, you’ll find it easier to adjust to change. It could be as petty as putting a halt to unhealthy relationships or even getting rid of some bad habits. Even if you wake up today and feel the need for a career shift, as long as it’s logical do it without worrying what other people might think. It will be challenging to stand by your principles and decisions at first, but it will work out well for you in the long run. Nonetheless, don’t do it out of envy, cutting off bridges that you might need soon. Be smart. If you are unable to cope with change, you can reach out for more help on how To Set Healthy Boundaries.
Practice gratitude
Gratitude can get you to places money won’t in this life. Learn to always show gratitude to your family, friends, colleagues, and even to God cause we wouldn’t be here discussing this had he not given you a chance to live. Practicing gratitude is as easy as jotting down things you are grateful for and following through with showing appreciation for them. If you are grateful for the shade, water the tree. If you’re grateful for your spouse, show them it’s not rocket science and just a simple thank you would do. Be grateful for your failures, they are a window to your success and the fact that you tried once and failed is an indication that you are one step closer to success. With such a mindset, you’ll change how you view things and will never stop when things get hard cause you’re used to appreciating the water inside the glass. Take it as a challenge, and from today start practising gratitude.
Reframe your thinking
It’s no doubt that our twenties were our best years. You were full of energy to do whatever you wanted with whatever you had. Your health was in check, and so were your relationships. However, now it’s almost impossible to gauge either of these. Since your back has been aching more than usual and you can’t remember the last time you had a good night’s sleep. Also, you’re not so sure you are fully functional your knees have given in and you couldn’t do ten burpees to save your life. On the other side, almost all of your children are moving into their own homes or are in college. The last born is in high school, and you can’t understand what they want anymore. Neither is your spouse looking as stunning as she used to look when you both got married. Looking at your situation this way makes everything look like it’s changed for the worst. But that’s if you haven’t taken a deeper look into your previous life. Where you’d go for days without having a real meal because your finances were in the thick of it. You were struggling to understand your new spouse, who seemed impossible to please. Before long, you were battling, with a new baby on board and keeping up with your job and bills. Now can you see that your youth wasn’t just the good old days? There were challenges and difficulties you faced. Looking at where you’re standing now, you did overcome those trying times. So be sure that even this frightening stage will also come to pass.
So, thank you all so much for watching and before you go, remember to subscribe to the channel, and leave a like for that YouTube algorithm. With that being said, have a great day and see you all in the next one!
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